pacifier problems

[mum]

Can anybody suggest ways of weaning a baby off her pacifier, especially when she's dependent on it to go to sleep?
Thanks

[Flashdog]

Hi,
When my daughter was about 7 months I just didn't give it to her one night.  She was upset but did eventually go to sleep that night.  I actually found that sometimes it was more me putting the dummy in her mouth thinking it was what she wanted rather than her trying to indicate she wanted the dummy.

Which ever path you decide to take, be firm and don't re-introduce the dummy for the times you decide it won't be used.

Eg: if you first decide to stop it for the daytime sleeps, then never introduce it back in the daytime.
If the baby can go to sleep without it some of the time, then they should be able to not use it eventually all of the time.

[SA chick]

how old is your baby?  i only took my children off their dummys when they were 3 years old (at that stage they were only allowed it in the bed!)  at 3 years both voluntarily put their dummys in the bin and i  havent had a moments problem since.  

[Mum]

SA chick, my baby is only 2 months old. I know she's still tiny but she won't go to sleep without it. I have no problems with her having the pacifier but she screams and shakes uncontrolably if I take it off her when she's dozing off. I wondered wether not having it at all would be better. We were really careful about the times we gave her it but then she became sick and it's all gone pair shaped since then.

[SA chick]

it all depends on how you feel about your baby having a dummy - if you are a mummy who doesnt agree with it then perservere like flashdog recommends, remember there is no right from wrong its just how you feel about the situation.  i used to roll up (veertically) a terry nappy and put it at the side of my babies head and i always had my baby lying on his (and her) side and then the dummy if it fell out would be propped in by the nappy
i know it sounds wierd but it did work especially at night and stopped me getting up in the night just to put the dummy back.  good luck with whatever you decide to do

[mum]

Thanks SA chick. My real concern is getting up during the night to put the dummy back in, other than that I have no problems with using it.
Thanks for your suggestion.

[How About?]

What I do is pretty similar to what SA Chick does, but for a different purpose.

My 7 month old son uses a dummy too.  But once he falls asleep, I take it away.  But in order not to disrupt his sleep, finding his dummy missing, I roll up my husband's T-shirt worn during the day, and place it next to his head.  That does not fail to comfort him.  This of course only worked because my husband used to hold my son bare bodied since birth, when he was trying to bond with him.

[This message has been edited by How About? (edited 06-11-2003).]

[Danielle]

Some people have no problems using a dummy with their baby, others will 'put up' with having to pop it back into baby's mouth several times a night, just to have it as a fail safe sleep aid. I used a dummy with my youngest baby as a sleep aid, but stopped this practice when he was about 10 weeks, as I noticed he was waking up in order to have it popped back in when he'd enter a light phase of sleep. So, to avoid the association I got rid of it. I knew babies can do well without one as my first child hadn't had one. Eliminating the dummy took me quite a while. I 'gave in' and relented when the crying happened, but hardened my resolve when I realised that the chopping and changing was making everything worse. It took a good 3 weeks of persistant work to eliminate. I would comfort him by cuddling, then patting and using a soothing voice to settle him. It took more time than sticking the dummy in, but when the habit was forgotten, then he learned to drop off to sleep on his own and a new habit was formed - me wrapping him up, giving him a cuddle, placing him in his basinette drowsy, but awake. He has been a brilliant sleeper since, resettling himself. I found the short ordeal of breaking the habit worthwhile, but do not judge others who see things differently.

[Wendy Windy Knickers]

My youngest daughter loved a dummy and had one until she was about 9 or 10 months old, and I always worried about how I'd wean her off it.  One day she sorted it out for me by throwing the dummy out of the cot, and despite me searching for it, I couldn't find it.  It was her only dummy at the time, and too late to go out and buy more that night, so I had to let her sleep without it.  She was grizzly at first, but went to sleep without it, so I didn't bother buying any more and never had a problem with her sleeping either.  However, she does have a blanket which she insists goes to bed with her every night - so maybe that was her dummy exchange!  

[.02 cents]

Disregard this message if you already have a child who uses a pacifier. But if you are expecting or have a newborn I would say don't offer a pacifier at all.

I think you are just creating a habit that will be very hard to break later. Kids get so dependent on their dummys and I know of so many parents who go through hell to break the habit later.

You will probably have a bit more work with your baby but you life will be a lot easier down the road.

[mimo123]

Both our kids used pacifiers at bedtime.  It isn't a big deal to us since that's the only time they used them.  While we encourage them not to depend on pacifiers, we pretty much leave it to them when they are weaned.

The older kid stopped using it at naptime at first and then was weaned off at night.  As far as I can recall, weaning him off it wasn't traumatic, as we let him take the lead.  He was off it by 3.  Our younger one (he's 2 now) is still using it at bedtime but he's also showing signs of slowly weaning himself off it.  As for looking for the pacifiers at night,   the older one used to go to bed with 3 of them, so he can easily find one for himself in the middle of the night.  The younger one takes only one to bed and he's been able to find it by himself most of the time.  

[3 cents]

babies  were not actually born to use dummies.  Never used them on ours and never will.  

[mimo123]

3 cents-- Yes,  babies are not born to use dummies.  But what about the thumb?  Don't they suck it for comfort, in the absence of the pacifiers?  Given between the thumb and pacifier,  we chose the pacifier for several reasons.  Chief amongst them were: we can sterilise the pacifier before offering it to baby and we can remove the pacifier when we want to discourage baby from using it unneccessarily.

This is probably an extreme case...I once met a woman whose one thumb is misshapened, compared to her other nine fingers because she was a passionate thumb-sucker who couldn't quit the habit till she was much, much older.

But as in many parenting matters, this is a choice that we all have to make and try to make, with the best interests of our children in mind.

[duhhhhhh]

Baby 1  had pacifier and we posted it to the faries with no problems when he was 2.5.  Baby number 2 spat it out from the start.  No soggy thumbs, no buck teeth ,just do what suits you and your baby.  

[Santa Claus]

We got our daughter to clean her dummy and leave it out for Santa to give it to a poor child who hadn't got one.