14 months - not talking

[worried mama]

I've got a 14 month old son and I'm slightly worried that he's not saying any words.  I think he should at least be saying mama or papa by now.

Have any of you been through this with your kids?

Should I start worrying from now, or is it still too early?

[All different]

There are quite a good previous threads on this topic giving a very solid advice and calming words - have a look on those. For example my brother's kids have been both late talkers - the 3 year old speaks now way too much   My friend's 13 month old doesn't yet say real words - just some sounds.

[TheBowenFamily]

My daughter is 19 months and not talking. She has a fantastic understanding though so I'm not worried. My husband and I were both late talkers - (2yrs+) and we both made it through life ok - both went to Uni etc.

Try not to worry ....

[Mum23]

My 16 month old isn't really talking either.  She was an early walker (9 months), her gross motor skills are excellent, she's a clever little thing, and our older children were also 'late' talkers (from ~2 years) so we're not concerned.  The temper tantrums that result from her frustration at not being able to communicate as well as she'd like aren't fun, but we've taught her a few basic signs (drink, eat, yes, no etc) and they seem to be curbing them a bit.

Good luck and try not to stress.

[STOP!]

Dear OP,  do not start worrying, for goodness sake.  Your child is 14 months.  So what if no words are coming out yet.

I always recall these wise words once said to me:
we do desparately want our kids to talk, and then once they do, we are always telling them to keep quiet, or trying to get a word in ourselves  (My 9 year old doesn't shut up!)
We are desparate for them to walk, and then spend the rest of our lives telling them to slow down, be careful.

Another tip is to aks yourself how often does she hear you say 'mama'.  Do you refer to yourself as mama?  When my first born was little, my husband was concerned she never said dada, but when my husband spoke to her, he would say, come to me, not come to dada.  Once he changed his way of communicating my daughter started calling him dada.  Easy.

[worried mama]

Thank you all for your responses.  You've made me feel much better.

I know I must sound so paranoid.  It's my first child, maybe I'll be more chilled out with the next :-)

[Mum23]

Nah, you probably won't.  It's normal to worry about your child.  That's what mothers do.  No matter how many you have.  And it doesn't matter how old their children are, mothers worry.

[Another worried Mum]

Our son couldn't talk until he was just over 2 years old.  We were really worried when he was 18 months old so our paediatrician suggested that we take him to see a speech pathologist at The Paragon.  The speech pathologist really scared us when she told us that our son was really slow and was below average.  She said that boys should be able to say several words by the time they're 18 months old.  

All of my friends told me that girls generally learn to talk much faster than boys.  They are usually much chattier.  Anyway, our son's first word was "car", not  mummy or daddy.  He is now 4.5 yrs old and we can't shut him up.  I think he can talk under water.  He goes to one of the international schools here and is just like all of the other boys in his class - full of life, up to mischief and very talkative.  

[TheBowenFamily]

To Mum23

My daughter was also an early walker (9 months) - I totally agree with your thoughts!

I know she understands me and I regularily check her vocab understanding with pictures.

[no worries]

As long as his understanding is there then there's no need to worry.  Different children learn at different paces, one of my friends has a 2 year old boy who talked in complete sentences almost from the moment he started talking but another has a boy exactly the same age who strings 2 words together and that's as far as it gets.  If he's not behind in other areas you have no worries.  All children develop differently, my advice, burn the books they are the worst thing for getting you worried.

[globetrotter]

Not to worry, especially if you're a bilingual family - apparently bilingual kids start to talk later.

A couple of suggestions:
- keep talking to your son, whatever you're doing (I felt a bit daft when mine was a few months old, because it felt more as though I was talking to myself)
- teach your son baby sign language