Did it happen to you?

[workingMum]

I had my second baby 9 months ago and feeling like time to go back to work again. But after having coupl eof interviews and two job offers, I have started to list some excuses to not to accept the offers which I was very keen to get initially. I was working mum with 3 months old baby at the first one, but have been having a lot of fun with the kids at home recently. I don't want to ruin my career and never planned to stay at home but don't want to make myself and rest of the family unhappy either.

I am not sure if that means I am not ready to work yet or things will be OK after a while. I appreciate any comments or experiences.

Cheers,

[mumof3]

I fully support working mothers, however, if you are having mixed feelings....take the time you need and make the right decision for you and your family.
There is always time to work a few years down the road when the children go to school (believe me, the time goes fast). No, the perfect job may not be waiting, but you will have spent the most formative years with your children, when they benefit from having you at home the most. It's challenging, tiring and unglamorous to be a stay-at-home mom, but many years from now, you will know you did the right thing. Appreciate the time you have with them now....you won't regret it later. Good luck with your decision.

[Mom's the work]

Fact is that governments all over the world should use their taxes to pay mothers a full time salary - because it's a full time job (besides sitting at cafes and sipping coffee and exchanging gossip during those rare precious breaks in between when kids aren't around)

[workingMum]

mumof3 and Mom's the work,
Thanks for your comments. I really needed some advice from poeple who has gone through this. Can anyone suggest me what would be the easy age for th kids to leave behind? I have a rather slow motion maid and don'tthink she can cope with my super active tpddler (2,5 yo) and the baby yet. I am wondering if it gets any easier after 3 or 4 years old? I don't want to wait until they are 10 or something tho.

[Working&Kids]

I am a true believer in going with your gut instinct. I knew when I was ready to go back to work with my first child. I knew that the childcare arrangement I had found was very good, I knew my child was ready to be without me throughout the day and I felt that I needed to do something for myself as being a fulltime mother was killing my self-esteem (my lack of interaction with adults and not using my brain was making me blue, plus I don't like the idea of not being able to contribute to the household finances).

However, when I moved here I wasn't comfortable with leaving my children with one person all day at home (in London I used a very well recommended full-time nursery with qualified staff) so any work I did was from home.

Don't buy into the fact that you need to stay at home to be a good parent but if it doesn't feel right at the moment then give it a little more time. If you are not comfortable with the idea of working now it is important to ask yourself why. Is it because you really want to be with your children or is it more fear for yourself? Many women are very nervous about going back to work after a break and they fear not being able to cope, it's easier on the ego to turn down an offer than to fell that you might struggle and quit/be fired.

When you are ready you will know it, if you have been offered jobs already I am sure in the future you won't have trouble having more offers.

[Chaste]

It's the old adage, no one on their death bed has ever been hear dto proclaim "I wish I had spent more time at the office".

If you have real doubts, you won't ever be able to truly and commit and thus enjoy your new job.

Assuming economics permit give yourself some time and either the career will start to feel right for you again or it won't and you'll know for sure.

Worse thing is to sacrifice time with your children for a job you're ultimately never going to really settle into. That's the worst of both worlds.