Why do people have to be so nasty on this message board?

[Ladybug]

Just a note to all of you anonymous cowards out there who continually post nasty and sarcastic responses to people who are genuinely trying to get feedback on important issues- what is your problem? I think this message board is a great resource and find it sad that some people only use it to derogate others and vent their undigested emotions online. All I can say is 'get a life' and leave the board to the rest of us who want to use it as a tool of communication- not a garbage refuse.

[Sabrina]

Ladybug...YOU GO GIRL!!...

------------------
sabsters

[Ladybug]

Thanks sabsters- I am quietly awaiting a barrage of responses from various persons...or should I say personae non gratae...

[T2K]

Lady,

You're in the 'Talking Point' section - only registered users can reply here.  I doubt you will get a barrage of negative replies.

However, to answer your question, I think it's a common thing with message *** because:

1.  Everyone is more or less anonymous, you can communicate here in ways which you cannot in the real world.

2.  As everything is in writing it is easy to take your time to pick apart what other people have said, and have them do the same to you, ad infinitum

3.  If you're in a bad mood, you can turn here for an anonymous flaming rant which might make you feel better.  It happens even to the nicest posters from time to time.

Cheers

[Ladybug]

T2K, very well put. Well, I guess I myself used the board to get something off my chest by posting this very topic...perhaps I will stick to the 'registered users only' section in future- thoughtful responses like yours are the only ones that really interest me.

[cactus]

As someone who has been name called and flamed, I know how it feels. At one point, two unregistered users went as far as to attempt slander not just on myself but my own family too.

I notice several patterns:
(1) The garbage usually starts on controversial topics (race, religion, manners, relationships).
(2) The name calling and slander starts when someone reads something which does not tickle their ears, usually an alternative, non-mainstream opinion. Things they would never dare say in real life are gleefully vollied from the safety of their keyboard.
(3) They will stop at nothing. Even a thread meant to congratulate a fellow on his marriage becomes a target.
(4) Unregistered names predominate among the cowards. Often a similar writing style and diction can be detected across two or more unregistered aliases.
(5) A predictable target topic (eg. SPGs) are often started by these malcontents for the express purpose of venting their bile.
(6) The most favourite topics for flaming always involve interracial relationships. (7) My intuition is that much of the trouble originates with young, insecure local males. Deepest apologies if that thought offends anyone but in good faith, that is my honest opinion.

Many have been driven away from the message board in disgust, and that nearly included me at one point.

That's my take on it.

[This message has been edited by cactus (edited 27-08-2002).]

[BoardManager]

Ladybug
There are several reasons. Some have been mentioned by T2K. Other reasons include
1. People who have axes to grind with us. These are mainly people we have blocked out because a) they refuse to pay, from as little as the S$60.00, the listing or advertising fees; b) See my other thread : http://www.expatsingapore.com/ubb/Forum4/HTML/009575.html

These people come and agitate as part of their pay-back.

2. Other websites have sprung up and have been caught red-handed harvesting our users' emails. They try to lure our users over by all means. We have received many complaints and have written to them. Dissatisfied, they hit back.

3. Some of our staff who have left us on less than happy terms seek revenge. Again, very childish.

4. There are many sick people out there.

Anyway, we should persevere; we should keep at it, doing the right things. Let these trouble makers be.

[boardsurfer]

Ladybug

I agree with you. My wife was on the site the other day and she was reading through the posts...she has not been on the site before, whereas I am almost habitual.... and she said that she could not believe the nastiness that comes through on all the posts - especially in the careers area.

I have also noticed that a lot of the old timers that tended to bring fun stories to the board have left and that the general feel of the board is more negative than it used to be...maybe it is the economy.

I also notice that more unregistered people are coming on the board just to stir up trouble and be abusive.

Maybe it is time for the BM to make a serious business decision... and it wont be easy. Do you try to foster a tight community that is to some extent regulated at the expense of attracting a broad audience?
I have stopped making comment son the main areas as you just come across to many idiots out to cause trouble....Talking Point is like the oasis in a sea of grief  

[Ladybug]

Thanks all for your comments- hey help restore my faith in this very useful resource. Thanks also BM for the info- I didn't at first understand that this message board was sponsored by an individual company- it must be dissapointing for you to see it being abused with negative content. I guess in the future I will avoid controverisial topics and stick to the informational ones because in regard to practical info, I have been getting some very helpful responses.

[Post It]

1)At some point, people will learn not to fight with the BM. He controls the board.

2)Allowing Mr. McBain the leeway he has enjoyed invites further abuse. There’s no exscuse for his behavior and it invites imitators and apologists whom I will not name. I’m surprised the BM allows it to continue. Why?

3)Unfounded and accusatory statements such as “much of the trouble originates with young, insecure local males” do as much to create an environment of nastiness as Mr. McBain’s rants. The difference is that McBain is trying to be a dick.

4)My observation is that some people will get slammed when making genuine inquiries.  That’s unfortunate. However, more people get slammed when mistaking unmitigated nonsense for statement of fact or “just an opinion.” That may or may not be unfortunate.

5)I believe that people who avoid touchy topics rarely get flamed. Those who do are usually done in by a McBain wannabe or a one-off that’s relatively easy to shake off.

6)I personally live by a no-first-strike rule. I tend not to engage in any nastiness unless struck first. Then the gloves might come off or I might just move on.

[Morrolan]

personally, i still think the Board is an extremely useful resource, but it is indeed becoming more difficult to find good content.

i realise that i may be considered as one who doesn't always stick to sensible posts and sometimes even resorts to sarcasm, however, i limit my tongue-in-cheek posts to the forum set up for that purpose.

i grow very angry at some of the abusive posts aimed at certain people or groups of people and i will lash out in those instances at the anonymous posters, because i consider a number of those people my friends. like some of the other posters i regret that a significant number of registered users left or have just stopped posting because of the abuse.

however, a goodly number of the registered users on this Board have become very close to me and i will stick around and post and behave silly, no matter what anonymous posters throw at us (sticks and stones).

------------------
"Ambition is the last refuge of the failure." Oscar Wilde

[BoardManager]

Fair enough, point taken re the likes of McBain. We will endeavour to trim him and his gang (they are all the same person, from the same IP log!) to size and remove his offensive posts.

[musp]

I have found the board useful and I am glad I stumbled on to it.

All I suggest is - Don't bite the bait.

There are plenty of sick people out there who just gloat and bask in fake glory when their post starts a lot of flaming and the post runs into 20 - 30 messages. They get a sense of achievement, being usually failures.

Take for example the post on cricket, where some cricket lovers were discussing the game and some wierdo starts insulting the game.
http://www.expatsingapore.com/ubb/Forum9/HTML/002202.html

The best thing they did was to ignore those posts.
 

[Nin's]

From one that's been tired of the trolls too:
BM, what action do you take once you recognise the troll's IP log? do you ban it permanently? I am just curious.
I just can't take it anymore reading posts that seeking for advice only to get snapped at.

[Ah Seng]

1. Isn't this what freedom of speech is all about?
2. You can always choose to ignore the offending post. If everybody does that, it will soon die a natural death. If you choose to get all worked up and respond, well, to put it bluntly, you ask for it. Look at the number of posts with zero response and how fast they disappear from your screen.
3. Do not forget that some of those messages by unregistered users were actually posted by registered users. There was an interesting debate on this trolls business a while back but funnily enough, not many registered users seemed keen to contribute their views.
4. There's no evidence to show that it's the locals who were the culprits. It would be too obvious. It's simply people who're up to some mischief.
5. As for non-mainstream, alternative views, put it this way, how radical can your views get before they're taken off the board? So rest assured, everything has been rather tame. And that's coming from a conservative local.