Whether it is a maid, family member or babysitter minding your children, one of the most important things to be explicit about is discipline .. what constitutes disciplinable (is this a word?) behaviour, and what if any action should be taken. Regardless of who it is, you must make it clear that you will not tolerate any discipline of your child that you do not permit and that if you hear of your child being hit or pinched, for example, you will terminate the relationship.
In many cultures spanking, or 'biting back' a child that bites, is acceptable. Exhaustion and frustration can all too quickly lead to inappropriate or violent behaviour. Many helpers, unfortunately, have been abused by either family members or previous employers. Clearly state your wishes up front and demonstrate by your own actions what is appropriate behaviour.
I wish you luck in finding someone suitable and hope you never have to deal with such an instance again.
