Stressed Wife - Need Aussie expat advice please !

[shaneconroy]

I am 35 and live in Sydney.

I have just been offerred a permanent role in Singapore. Need advice as have young family (2yrs old and 9 months) and very stressed wife.

Offer on the table is $150k.sg + relocation + accomodation and medical.

Primary areas of advice needed are:

1) Need a 3 brm condo (furnished) with good facilities/pool close to shops and MUST be located where majority of Aust. expats are  as wife will need new support network as I will be travelling 50% of time. How much will this cost and where should I be looking. Any recommendations on agents is appreciated. (I would be working close to Odeon Towers  - North Bridge Road.)

2) Child care in Singapore - advice for best Aussie children childcare centre and location/costs ? 2yr old and 8 mnth old say 2 days a week. Will pay top dollar.

3) My wife (31 yrs old) would be happy playing tennis and sitting by the pool, chatting to other wifes with young babies, going shopping etc. Advice for best way to network with aussies so I get her involved quickly ?

4) Car Seats - I do not get a coy car so will need to commute via taxi. Biggest problem is 8 mth old. Can you get taxis with car seats like in Oz. Pls set my expectations.

Current Situation:
Live in eastern suburbs of Sydney
Play comp tennis at White City
Am studying MBA at SydUni.

Need help people with normal questions of relocation etc. Your help is much appreciated.

Shane.

[KatyF]

There are a lot of Aussies living round the Australian school - condos close by are Pandan Valley, Ridgewood, Cavendish Park (and lots more ...).  There are always plenty of women around with young babies who I'm sure would love some company!

[chriso]

shane send me an email to chriso@singnet.com.sg and I will reply with an answer to your questions in detail. Also tell you about the tax situation

[Out there]

At 150k you can get what ever you want.
Have some thought for those of us who mave moved here and have a great life on 4k

[Matey]

Ditch the wife - she sounds like so much whinging excess baggage. Get a Filipina housemaid to look after the flat and raise the kids (everyone does  it) and enjoy the single life of a well-off caucasian expat - you won't be disappointed. Yowza, SPG's!

[my two cents]

Here we go again, and I know that some people who have no idea of your current life are going to shoot me down, but I am going to take the time to give you an honest reply as I should have done what you are doing and didn't and would have loved an honest answer.

I from Syd, am the same age, have two kids around the same age.

1.  Condo, there are lots of choices. I reckon $5k per month MIN. $7.5 will give you something nice with good facilities - I would suggest Duchess Crest/Astrid Meadows or something more central. Hmm, agents, I reckon they are all dodgy. You'll just have to do the hard yards with looking at lots of condos - my agents tips are never tell your real budget, always ask for lots of things to get done (and make sure they pay for air con servicing), and always offer less than they ask and try and get lease in company's name.

2. Childcare like is in Syd hardly exists. You could go pre-school from 2 1/2 up but nothing for 8mth old. There are lots of activities for mums and kids such as Gymboree, Centre Stage, Prime Gym, Tumble Tots, Julia Gabriel etc and I would also reccommend these as a way to meet other people in same situation, same age kids. Most of my friends are from doing this.  Most people have a maid, and even if you think you won't, you probably will (O I am going to get shot down for that one, I just know!)

3. See above. Also, most condos are social, join ANZA, it's all pretty easy here to make friends, easier than Sydney.

4. I think this is your big prob. I think you need a car with two kids - taxis are cheap and plentiful, but just wait until you want one when it rains (yes, in Singapore this does happen a bit) or in peak hour and then they are a bugger to get.  Try and get some budget or be prepard to fork out for yourself or be annoyed about it. Umm, a car can cost as little as $650 a month plus $10,000 deposit you get back with PARF.  Taxis do not have car seats.

We are on about the same deal you are being offered. I don't know what you earn now, but I think Singapore is about 1.5 times the cost of living in Sydney. Wine and eating in western places is awfully expesive. Elect bill is $500 per month, petrol is horrific, the food bill is lots more - even nappies seem to be double the price, your phone bill with triple overnight, you will want to fly home with the kids once or twice a year, and you deserve extra savings for being away from home. For me, if they threw in paying your utilities, car and flights home it would be worth it. However, it's a great place to live with young kids, and lounging around the pool is fun.

O, Pandan Valley is awful. Katy F, have you ever been to Sydney's Eastern suburbs? Out there, you also have given no consideration to this guy's current life.  I am sure lots of Indian Workers live here on $1k a month and think life is sweet, but this guy and his wife wouldn't.

As I said, my two cents.

Good luck.

[Kubes]

I think that you will be quite comfortable on that package.  The watchout is schooling, it does not seem to be covered.  If you want the kids to go to an international school, you will find that that costs about S$13-$18K per year per kid.  Our 2.5 yo goes to a local pre-school at the cost of $750/mth for 5-days 7:30-18:30 and the 5.5yo goes to the Aust Int School.  

Your housing choices should be great.  By now you should expect to negotiate 20-30% off what landlords are asking.  And there expectations are down 30-40% compared to 2 years ago.  Net you can get something now for half the rate of 2 years ago.  If the landlord doesn't want to come down that much, just walk - there is a huge surplus of all types of properties on the market.  

I agree with the comments on getting a car - we have just bought a new one at a cost 2.5 times higher than any car I have owned or leased before.  But with the extremely low tax rates here (assuming you are really local) it actually is costing me much less as a percentage of my disposable income than the cars I owned in Aust.

We are not finding Singapore to be that expensive compared to the upper Nth Shore costs.  That is assuming you are smart about where you shop and where you eat.

[sympathize]

One crucial thing - why is your wife stressed? Reason I ask is that if she has certain problems/issues BEFORE leaving, Singapore can be very trying.

If it's a fear about the new and untried, she'll have no problems especially if she's happy with the homemaker role bit.

The Australia New Zealand Association here is 50 years old and is a great resource/company as is this message board.

Bring over as much Australian wine as you can get - it costs a bomb here!

$150k is heaps! As an earlier poster here said - people are doing alright on $4k!

[Relocation]

Good package- I am so sad sounds better than ours...Anyway, for $5000 a month you'll find an excellent 3 bedroom condo-remember the market is lower than previously too, however being fully furnished may be difficult but including a fridge, dishwasher, microwave and drier in that price is usual. Having said that I have friends across from the Aussie school in a complex that has been recently renovated which has excellent facilities including shops and their rentals are all around $2500- this is high rise and every flat/apartment you see there has been decorated and maintained differently. Furniture can be rented but as in all places it is costly. There is Ikea and a lot of Indonesian furniture here and a huge amount of garage sales and secondhand stuff for sale on supermarket notice *** mainly from leaving expats.
Schooling and playgroup activities etc is expensive and per session is probably more than you expect at home. Singapore is an easy place to live however the cost of food and alcohol and cars will come as a shock.A maid...hmmmmm, maybe, maybe not...some people like a full time maid but I could not stand having somebody living with us and in a pokey room out back to boot and yes, I have kids.Try someone part time to do ironing and cleaning etc and get a feel for the place before you jump in and get a maid. Bring your barbie and a lot of alcohol even tho' you pay duty it is well worth it!Also when you arrive I assume your company will put you in a serviced apartment-this  is a good time for your wife to get around and get orientated. I heard horror stories from people about taking weeks and weeks to find an apartment. We emailed ahead and the agent shortlisted on our requirements and found it the first day looking and finalised it the second and moved in within 2 weeks. Having moved so often, I find it easy here but the moving and packing up is never easy-We insure and list everything because no matter what they say they will scratch or break something. We have also left the majority of our favourite antiques and treasures at home.Now with more children and not enough hands to catch them I left the hous and went to my mother-in-laws while they packed and my husband stayed - all in all I think it took three days (we have a lot of stuff!!).

[Aussie also]

Hi agree with the above remarks. Your package sounds excellent and you will get a great place that your wife will be very happy with. We left Sydney 9 months ago, our 2 children go to the Aust. International School and we have met lots of Aussies & NZ through the school as have the kids.  Agree you should get something very nice near the school, I have a lot of friends with nice little terrace houses in Pandan Valley and they walk their kids to school. We actually live 10 minutes drive away and we have a 3 bdr apartment and it costs $2500 per month. Excellent facilities, huge lap pool, baby pool, gym, squash court, 2 tennis courts, function room, play equipment for kids, so there is what you'll get for $2500 a month, so on your package you will get a lot more. Tell your wife to get out and get going immediately, dont think to much, join ANZA and go to playgroups. I left Sydney to go to Bangkok with a three year old and a 2 month old, so Singapore's a breeze in comparison. The car, I can see will be a problem, we have a company car, but it is used by my husband, the children go on the AIS school bus, but getting around in the rain ie; taxi's etc is a nightmare, let alone having two small children to get in and out. Hope this helps and we all look forward to hearing from you on the board when you arrive.

[JD]

I just wanted to say don't just choose to socialise with fellow Aussies. There are lots of Brits/Kiwi's/Americans/Canadians here as well as Singaporeans. We all have young children, husbands that travel and are struggling along with life here as well. I am very jealous when our Aussie friends can "pop" home with a 7 hour flight. To get home I have to do 14-not fun with a toddler on your own.
A move to Singapore should widen your horizons- we have made friends with folks from different nationalities and its interesting to learn about other nationalities celebrate other holidays. It will be hard  initially but we are all pretty much in the same boat.
Your wife should try calling St Georges Church in Tanglin-they run non religious playgroups from babies upwards. One morning a week and each session costs $2.00 It is run specificallt for new moms and Moms new to Singapore.
Good Luck!

[Pandan Valleyite]

Shuddering, she directed the taxi through the gates of the condo.  What a day!  Only that morning, someone had asked her where she lived.  She'd had to lie, of course.  "Duchess Crest, of course!  So central and convenient."  Her friend had nodded approvingly, and yet another nightmare episode had passed.

As she climbed the steps to the apartment, she heard a halloo from below.  "How's it going, love?"  She sighed.  Mr Chatterjee again.  Such a nice man, but so non-North Shore.  If her mother could see her now ...

She opened the door and stepped into the squalid space she called home.  Pandan Valley.  What a dump.  And yet - so handy for the Australian School!  So close to Holland Village and Orchard Road!  A minimart downstairs!  Pool, tennis court, squash, library, barbecues!  A renovated four bedroom unit of 2500 sq.ft. for $2500!   Still, it was no good, and she knew she would have to move and soon to a new modern place.  Yes, it would be smaller and more expensive, but hell, it would be worth it.

[Relocation]

Pandan Valleyite-You are funny!!I am crying laughing! Incidentally the best cond I've ever seen is there with a grassed balcony plus another outdoor area, fully renovated, absolutely beautiful but it did have a high rental, about $6000 or more, but gorgeous_i was soooooooooooo jealous!!

[Wizard of Aussie]

You seriously may want to adjust that xenophobic attitude before you get here.

[Singapore Man]

I have never read so much crap in my entire life. This is so pathetic....Complaining with 150K a year? Shame on you

[This message has been edited by BoardManager (edited 25-02-2002).]