When should your kids stop seeing you naked

[A dad]

We have a daughter who is 18 months old. She's started to notice bodies, genitals etc and my wife thinks we shouldn't let her see us, and particularly me, naked any more. Although I have no intention of wandering around the house naked for years, I think this is too earlyand an over-reaction.

What do others think?

[too young]

Agree, I think it is a little bit of an over reaction, 18 months is still very young.

[Broad Guide For Me]

When your child is no longer happy for you to see them naked, its time for you to cover up too.  

The time for me came when my older child was about 7 or 8 and no longer wanted anyone to come into the bathroom during bath time and it hasn't yet happened for my 5 year old.

I have NEVER seen either of my parents naked which I think is rather weird, isn't it?  Not that I ever wanted to, (that would be even weirder) but we were always given the impression that bodies were in some way something to be embarrassed about.

I think 18 months is a little early to worry about this sort of thing - perhaps its your wife who doesn't want to see you naked!

[A dad]

My wife's a bit wierd about this kind of thing, I think. She also refers to my daughter's vagina as a "flower" and my penis as a "noo nah" (when she talks about them at all, which is rare). Can't see what's wrong with the real names myself.

[English Nanny]

Your wife needs to understand that the way you are now will have a long term affect on how your little girl feels about her body !!
If you start hiding away she will feel that you cant be open about your body,I have worked in hospital and have seen girls from O-40 yrs old needing different things and all of them need to open about there bodies and you find the ones that are have had a open relationship at home at a young age,most girls will start to become shy at 6 upwards and you should follow this ,but as for your wife she needs to stay open as this will make your daughter in many years to come feel she can talk to mum and girl things !!! and not hide away

[.....................]

I have a sister-in-law who is weird about this stuff too. She gets very uptight if her daughters are playing in skirts and their underwear shows (they are 8 and 6) and she flat-out refuses to let the girls in the bathroom while their younger (4 year old) brother is bathing. I think she's setting them all up for some type of issues regarding their bodies.

I think following the advice here about taking the cue from the children and giving privacy when they feel they need it. (Unless of course they get to puberty and still don't want their privacy - LOL)

[personal preferance]

We are northern europeans and have no problems walking around naked or changing in front of our child until she was at least 10. As soon as anyone of you is uncomfortable, then it is time to start covering up.

[SA expat]

Personally I agree with the post that said when your children become uncomfertable with you seeing them naked then its time to cover up.  But I think its also a cultural thing.  In East Germany where I used to live, it is perfectly normal to be naked with your family and basically in general public, ok not walking down the street but by a lake, in the mixed sex sauna in a gym, by the river on a hot day it was ok to be totally naked.  It is also a personal thing , I grew up with a mother who was very open about her sexuality and her body and often walked around without clothes.  Me, I am very shy about my body and it takes me a lot of courage to be in a bikini in front of others.  What I am basically saying in a very long way is that its up to you and your wife how you want to approach this and its something that both of you should discuss and be open about.  Perhaps there is a reason for your wife to be this way about nakedness and bodies and this should be discussed as well.  Good luck.

[Lili Von Shtupp]

Hahaha! SA expat, where haven't you lived!!?? LOL! 

My husband thought it was weird the first time he saw me change in front of our baby son (he was an infant). I was like, Sweet Jesus, I breastfeed that kid! Personally, I never gave it much thought til he brought it up because my family never gave it much thought either. I just figured I'd see when he first starts to get weird about it. 

[Matter Of Fact]

I'm a father of two boys under 10 and my attitude has been to be matter-of-fact about the human body and it's functions. From small, they've wondered in and out of the bathroom whenever I'm showering. Examples of some of the Q&A we've had in the past: Q: Daddy, why is your XXXX (in case it gets deleted!) bigger than mine? A: I'm an adult and everything is bigger, for now. When you're older you'll be bigger too, including your XXXX. Q: Why doesn't mummy have a XXXX. A: Mummy's a woman but we're men. Women look different, but we both use the same place to wee-wee. And so on ...
I think the fact I haven't dodged these curiosities has made them comfortable and knowledgeable about 'private' matters. My older boy likes to close the door if he wants a poo-poo now which is fine, and I've had to tell them both at certain times not to play with themselves in public spaces! Generally, I've found it's helped to be honest and up front with facts about what is, after all, natural.

[SA expat]

Lili, one huge continent is still totally unexplored by lil old me and thats America.  My dream is to get there one day.   

[Lili Von Shtupp]

Oh, SA expat, I hear you. I've been all around North America and still haven't even scratched the surface. I'm certain that I have explored Asia far more extensively than I have my own country.

[Flower Power.]

My wife's a bit wierd about this kind of thing, I think. She also refers to my daughter's vagina as a "flower" and my penis as a "noo nah" (when she talks about them at all, which is rare). Can't see what's wrong with the real names myself.

Is this for real or are you having a laugh?  

Assuming you're not winding us up - get her to stop the stupid genitalia names before they stick and your daughter gets the p!ss taken out of her at school.  

To our children we've always called a penis a willy (which is quite typical where we're from) and missed off the v and the a of vagina (to soften the clinical sound of it!).  There's no need to go for penis and vagina if you don't want to, but calling them really silly names like flower and noo nah is a bit daft.  Incidentally my friend used to call her security blanket noo nah.  Saying "I'm going upstairs to cuddle my noo nah" could have got her into a lot of trouble  

[Flower Power.]

Oh yes, I got sidetracked - to add to your original post, I agree with whoever said that your children will certainly tell you when they don't want to see you naked. 

We've never hidden nakedness from our children and at the age of 11, our eldest still isn't bothered by it.  I'm sure she will be over the coming years, but at the moment, it isn't a problem.

[Hang Ups]

The body and it's functions are natural.  Covering them up and making a big deal out of stuff causes hang ups.

There is, of course, appropriate behavior concerning our bodies, and other people's bodies that should be taught over time.

My 11 year old son has just decided that he wants to shower alone but it's no big deal if my wife, the maid or I wander in to get something.  He's just decided he doesn't need to be supervised.

He wanders in when I poo and we wander in when he poos. I have always preferred my privacy when pooing but the occasional wander in doesn't freak me out.

He wanders in on my wife in the shower or myself in the shower and it's no big deal.

If and when he decides he wants more privacy, I suspect it will be because he has discovered self satisfaction.  I'm OK with it, will cross the bridge when I get there and make sure he doesn't get any weird ideas from kids at school.

BTW - at 18 months your daughter is a-sexual and probably is not making any discriminations about boy parts and girl parts.

It's your choice to cover up if you like but it's my choice not to.