Busting out all over - cleavage etiquette at the office

[spoiler]

OP, you should send this article to your co-workers:

According to a recent study conducted by Tulane University, women who exhibit sexy behavior on the job--such as wearing revealing clothes, flirting in person or through email, or massaging a male coworker's shoulders--may be losing out on promotions and raises.

The study surveyed 164 female MBA graduates who had been in the workforce for 12 years. 49% of those admitted (remarkably) that they had tried to advance their careers by being sexy.

The women who said they never engaged in sexy behavior had earned an average of three promotions. Women who said they had engaged in sexy behavior had earned only two promotions.

Women who did not engage in the sexy behavior earned an average of $75,000-$100,000; the sexy women earned an average of $50,000-$75,000.

The study didn't include any theories as to why sexy women receive fewer promotions and pay raises. Perhaps their bosses don't take them seriously, seeing their blatant sexy behavior as an attempt to get ahead through less-than-ethical means.

In any event, if you're a woman (or a man, for that matter) who has the misguided notion that flirting with your boss or dressing in revealing clothes will give you a boost up the corporate ladder, maybe you better think again.

[Yes but]

the whole issue is rather titilating.

...sorry

[TheWrathOfGrapes]

the whole issue is rather titilating.
...sorry

Indeed. But they are making mountains out of molehills...

[To spoiler]

That's all very well, but I want the cold hard facts!

The cold hard facts are:

Although politically incorrect this titillating study may be very good news for men.

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that staring at women’s breasts is good for a man’s health and can add years to his life. The journal reports gerontologist Dr. Karen Weatherby's findings that Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out.

Dr. Weatherby and researchers at three hospitals in Frankfurt, Germany compared the health of 200 male outpatients. The study required half of the men to look at well endowed females every day. The other half were to refrain from this.

After five years of breast watching the study revealed that bosom-watchers had lower blood pressure, slower resting pulse rates and fewer instances of coronary artery disease.

Dr. Weatherby reports that sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation.

The study indicates that staring at breasts for a few minutes each day cuts the risk of stroke and heart attack in half. Surely there has to be a more politically correct way!
*****************************

So in conclusion, serious cleavage in your face every day is good for your health. Now OP, for good of the majority, stop complaining.   

[Old Mike]

We seem to be milking this one for all it's worth.

[LOL!]

 

[TheWrathOfGrapes]

We seem to be milking this one for all it's worth.

OM - what udder nonsense!!!

 

[hibiscus24]

I should never have looked at this while at work. Laughing helplessly at my desk.



Keyboard... jammed... tears...

[watch out]

I should never have looked at this while at work. Laughing helplessly at my desk.


Keyboard... jammed... tears...

Well for heaven's sake, watch out for any crockery nearby.  The last thing we need is jugs flying about all over the workplace.  It's just unprofessional.

[alternatively]

If this conversation is getting a bit much for you, take a look at the one about dogs and talk about some nice puppies instead.

[Obvious]

OP, you should send this article to your co-workers:

According to a recent study conducted by Tulane University, women who exhibit sexy behavior on the job--such as wearing revealing clothes, flirting in person or through email, or massaging a male coworker's shoulders--may be losing out on promotions and raises.

The study surveyed 164 female MBA graduates who had been in the workforce for 12 years. 49% of those admitted (remarkably) that they had tried to advance their careers by being sexy.

The women who said they never engaged in sexy behavior had earned an average of three promotions. Women who said they had engaged in sexy behavior had earned only two promotions.

Women who did not engage in the sexy behavior earned an average of $75,000-$100,000; the sexy women earned an average of $50,000-$75,000.

The study didn't include any theories as to why sexy women receive fewer promotions and pay raises. Perhaps their bosses don't take them seriously, seeing their blatant sexy behavior as an attempt to get ahead through less-than-ethical means.

In any event, if you're a woman (or a man, for that matter) who has the misguided notion that flirting with your boss or dressing in revealing clothes will give you a boost up the corporate ladder, maybe you better think again.

Obviously that study only surveyed woman still in the workforce......The REALLY sexy woman nabbed the CEO and lived happily ever after on his 7 figure salary.........

[Obvioustoo]

That's all very well, but I want the cold hard facts!

The cold hard facts are:

Although politically incorrect this titillating study may be very good news for men.

The New England Journal of Medicine reports that staring at women’s breasts is good for a man’s health and can add years to his life. The journal reports gerontologist Dr. Karen Weatherby's findings that Just 10 minutes of staring at the charms of a female is roughly equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out.

Dr. Weatherby and researchers at three hospitals in Frankfurt, Germany compared the health of 200 male outpatients. The study required half of the men to look at well endowed females every day. The other half were to refrain from this.

After five years of breast watching the study revealed that bosom-watchers had lower blood pressure, slower resting pulse rates and fewer instances of coronary artery disease.

Dr. Weatherby reports that sexual excitement gets the heart pumping and improves blood circulation.

The study indicates that staring at breasts for a few minutes each day cuts the risk of stroke and heart attack in half. Surely there has to be a more politically correct way!
*****************************

So in conclusion, serious cleavage in your face every day is good for your health. Now OP, for good of the majority, stop complaining.   

This study forgot to mention that the bosom watches had actually been jailed for 5 years for sexual harassment, hence the lower blood pressure from sheer boredom..........

[old lag]

yea, life is a bit monotonous when you stop trying to keep abreast of things 

[str8-GUY]

  Guys, i thinks its his LADY boss he's talking about here so whats tits talking about cleavage and jugs, mountains over mole hills..and OP get back to work before she whips out her you know what

[oggle]

don't stare over their heads, stare right down their cleavage.  They'll get uncomfortable, realise they've made a boob and stop wearing low cut tops.

There was a woman in our place (the Bristol office) who used to dress like this too.  She got the cleavage treatment and, if my mammory serves me right, she got upset and came in wearing a polo neck after a few days.