The dating scene for expat women

[IMHO]

Less attractive women will always lose out to the more attractive ones, white or Asian, here or at home.

Same goes for men.

That's life. Live with it.

[Purdue]

"Sorry but I am finding this all a bit hard to believe, esp. the part about coloured men losing their lives for being seen with a white woman - what year are you talking about? hmmm, I am thinking that this is a total windup and its not even Friday."

2009 Arizona...

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/dawn-teo/mixed-race-couple-confron_b_308842.html

2009 Louisiana..not shot, but the judge would not marry interracial couples....

http://www.japanprobe.com/2009/10/19/japanese-media-reports-on-louisiana-interracial-marriage-case/

and the reverse, also in 2009...black men beating up a white man for dating a black woman...

http://blackpoliticalthought.blogspot.com/2009/08/brian-milligan-18-severely-beaten-by-10.html

I shall find some more later on and send it to you.

[SAE]

I read the first article - yes I know I should get a life LOL! 

and here is what I read about how the cops classified this as a racist incident:

"He's bald. He's got tattoos. He's making a comment about a white woman with a black man. One could assume that it might be a hate crime."

Is this for real? 

The reports you are citing come from extremists and are based more on media hype that convicts a criminal based on being bald (WTF??? )than real journalism.  I am not saying that racism doesnt exist and that some really bad hate crimes are carried out but does this really have any relevance to the dating scene for expat women. 

[Oh dear ...]

You think you have it bad here huh: noone getting you all hot and bothered. Auntie, in Milano there's endless hunks on every corner; problem is they're not into catching a wave in.

You'll be back here faster than you can say "BMI calculator".

What's with the auntie thing?  I am no more auntie than you are uncle! I hope you are not inferring that they are all gay in Milano or that I am some fat lumpo that wouldn't stand a chance as you couldn't be more wrong on both counts  

[Too touchy]

Isn't Aunty just a general local (friendly) term for a woman? why assume it means the person thinks you are "a fat lump"?

[To Purdue]

You are talking about isolated incidents.  I knew an Australian guy that got the snot beat out of him here because a bunch of ah bengs (it's never a one to one fight here with the locals) didn't like him being with a local girl, and told her so in Hokkien. 

Only difference between here and the US is that this never made the news, though it was reported to the police.

So, I could say that "Did you know that in Asia, a white man could be attacked or even killed by local men if he is seen dating an Asian woman?"

[Aphrodite]

I don't think I'm unattractive compared to local women thank you. We are all attractive.

[IMHO]

In your humble opinion, of course.

But since you are looking for dates, it's what the men think that matters.

In any case, it's not how you compare to local women that matters. It's how you compare to women in general.

If you are getting fewer dates, you must be in the eyes of men, less attractive than the women who do get dates, whether they are Asian or Western.

IMHO.

[Purdue]

"So, I could say that "Did you know that in Asia, a white man could be attacked or even killed by local men if he is seen dating an Asian woman?""

Probably happens more so in places such as China. In Singapore, the media probably wont report it, but the perps will be dealt with severely. In America, the media will pay a lot of attention, but it will take five years to come to trial, if at all. Talking about beating up another ethnicity or race, the Russians are the worst. If they find a Georgian guy with a Russian woman, more often than not, he will get beat up. The Soviets were among the most racist people in the world. They committed genocide on countries such as Ethiopia, Namibia, Indo-China and elsewhere in the guise of spreading communism. Yet a lot of people in non-white countries think that the Russians are progressive and dont think that they are racist...all brainwashed.

"but does this really have any relevance to the dating scene for expat women."

There are white American women from Georgia, Alabama, Texas, Arizona and elsewhere living in Singapore. Eventually, all of them go back, at least for a visit. Now do you really think that they will put their lives in line to date a local, however well educated he may be? Add to that her parents are not likely to approve especially in the states I have mentioned. I am not saying the person who started these things thinks along these lines or that she is even a white American...I dont know..but usually one of the three possibliites exist...either a racist by herself, not a racist, but fears family and parental reaction back home if she intended to have a relationship with a local guy or worse of all fears violence and may fear for her life...Forsyth County in Georgia is a prime example where she could face violence if seen with an Asian guy (there are other counties in the vicinity where a lot of white women would only be caught dead with a not-white guy, literally speaking but I agree these are few in numbers!!) I would like to think that white parental disapproval is rare, but I am not very optimistic having lived in the US heartland of Indiana, Colorado and of course in Massachussetts and now living in the nation's capital. Only one place in the US where I lived, would such a relationship be accepted without any reservation...Hawaii. Washington DC probably comes a close second, as long as you dont go twenty miles down south of here to rural Virginia or forty miles up north to rural Maryland.

[My thoughts ..]

In your humble opinion, of course.

But since you are looking for dates, it's what the men think that matters.

In any case, it's not how you compare to local women that matters. It's how you compare to women in general.

If you are getting fewer dates, you must be in the eyes of men, less attractive than the women who do get dates, whether they are Asian or Western.

IMHO.

I don't think you can be so simplistic in your reply IMHO.  We don't know how attractive the OP is ..  She could be drop dead gorgeous for all we know or she could be quite average in looks.  Guys don't always go for the "most attractive". In my humble opinion they go for the ones that "give out" especially here in Asia, alot of the guys are looking for a good time.

When I first arrived in Singapore, I went to an ex-pat meet up that was organised by one of the other ***.  It was a drinks evening held at a really nice venue. Since I was new in Asia, I went along hoping to make some new friends.  Nearly all of the females that turned up were Asian and dressed in very skimpy outfits.  Clearly these females were out to make an ex-pat catch and they were making it quite obvious that they were prepared to "give-out" so to speak.  Some of the guys were smitten with them.  The ex-pat girls on the other hand were more reserved but definitely not unattractive, in fact some were very hot.

I'm not saying that all Asian females are like this in company but I have noticed that they treat dating in a much more business like manner than their western counter-parts.

Just my thoughts ...

[DawnT]

Purdue,

I wrote the HuffPost article that you are quoting, and I just want to say that it was big news BECAUSE it was such an unusual incident. Also, the police never did determine it to be any type of hate crime. It could have been an ex-boyfriend, a crazy person, a meth addict, or any other number of things. These kinds of things do not happen often in America. They are, in fact, extremely rare occurrences.

[Purdue]

"These kinds of things do not happen often in America. They are, in fact, extremely rare occurrences."

Rare occurences, agreed. But, the atmosphere in some of the counties in the south..I can give you a list and the ghosts of the past do make people afraid. However, what is not rare is parental disapproval and the fact that there are many white guys who wont date white women who dated Asian men. Heck, I even know several white women from different countries ranging from South Africa to the US, currently living in Singapore, who wont date white men who either have dated Asian women or have been in the past married to Asian women...that I know for a fact...something many white women wont come out and say loudly on the street!

[Aging]

Caucasian women age a lot faster than Asian women:


Titre du document / Document title
Comparison of age-related changes in wrinkling and sagging of the skin in Caucasian females and in Japanese females

Auteur(s) / Author(s)
TSUKAHARA Kazue (1) ; FUJIMURA Tsutomu (1) ; YOSHIDA Yasuko (1) ; KITAHARA Takashi (1) ; HOTTA Mitsuyuki (1) ; MORIWAKI Shigeru (1) ; WITT Pamela S. (2) ; SIMION F. Anthony (2) ; TAKEMA Yoshinori (1) ;

Affiliation(s) du ou des auteurs / Author(s) Affiliation(s)
(1) Biological Science Laboratories, Kao Corporation, Toibigi, JAPON
(2) The Andrew Jergens Company, Cincinnati, Ohio, ETATS-UNIS

Résumé / Abstract
We compared age-related changes in wrinkles in eight areas of facial skin (forehead, glabella, upper eyelid, corner of the eye, lower eyelid, nasolabial groove, cheek, and corner of the mouth) and sagging in the subzygomatic area of Caucasian females and of Japanese females. The subjects studied included 85 healthy Caucasian females (ages 20-69 years) living in Cincinnati in the U.S. and 70 Japanese females (ages 20-69 years) living in Tokyo. Photos of the face in frontal and in oblique 45° views were analyzed. Wrinkles in the face and sagging in the subzygomatic area were graded on Japanese photoscales, respectively, by the same experienced observer. The wrinkle score increased with age in all eight areas of the face examined in Caucasian females as well as in Japanese females. In the group aged 20-29 years, the wrinkle score in each area was significantly higher in Caucasian females than in Japanese females. The wrinkle scores in the forehead, glabella, upper eyelid, and corner of the eye were similar at advanced ages between the two groups, while the wrinkle scores in lower areas of the face (lower eyelid, nasolabial groove, cheek, and corner of the mouth) were markedly higher in Caucasian females than in Japanese females in each age group, and reached an upper limit at advanced ages in Caucasian females. The sagging score also increased with age in Caucasian females as well as in Japanese females. The sagging score was significantly higher in Caucasian females than in Japanese females in the groups aged 40 years or more. These results suggest more marked wrinkle formation in all areas of the face in younger age groups of Caucasian females living in North America than in Japanese females living in Tokyo. In particular, Caucasian females showed marked age-related wrinkle formation in the lower areas of the face, probably due to sagging in the subzygomatic area, which suggests a higher susceptibility to sagging in the subzygomatic area of Caucasian females.

Revue / Journal Title
Journal of cosmetic science   ISSN 1525-7886   CODEN JCSCFC 

Source / Source
2004, vol. 55, no4, pp. 373-385 [13 page(s) (article)] (17 ref.)

Langue / Language
Anglais

Editeur / Publisher
Society of Cosmetic Chemists, New York, NY, ETATS-UNIS  (1998) (Revue)

[SAE]

"sagging in the subzygomatic area"

Ok, I cant be the only one who doesnt know what part of the body this is, can I?   

[such garbage]

Caucasian women age a lot faster than Asian women:


Titre du document / Document title
Comparison of age-related changes in wrinkling and sagging of the skin in Caucasian females and in Japanese females

Auteur(s) / Author(s)
TSUKAHARA Kazue (1) ; FUJIMURA Tsutomu (1) ; YOSHIDA Yasuko (1) ; KITAHARA Takashi (1) ; HOTTA Mitsuyuki (1) ; MORIWAKI Shigeru (1) ; WITT Pamela S. (2) ; SIMION F. Anthony (2) ; TAKEMA Yoshinori (1) ;

Affiliation(s) du ou des auteurs / Author(s) Affiliation(s)
(1) Biological Science Laboratories, Kao Corporation, Toibigi, JAPON
(2) The Andrew Jergens Company, Cincinnati, Ohio, ETATS-UNIS

Résumé / Abstract
We compared age-related changes in wrinkles in eight areas of facial skin (forehead, glabella, upper eyelid, corner of the eye, lower eyelid, nasolabial groove, cheek, and corner of the mouth) and sagging in the subzygomatic area of Caucasian females and of Japanese females. The subjects studied included 85 healthy Caucasian females (ages 20-69 years) living in Cincinnati in the U.S. and 70 Japanese females (ages 20-69 years) living in Tokyo. Photos of the face in frontal and in oblique 45° views were analyzed. Wrinkles in the face and sagging in the subzygomatic area were graded on Japanese photoscales, respectively, by the same experienced observer. The wrinkle score increased with age in all eight areas of the face examined in Caucasian females as well as in Japanese females. In the group aged 20-29 years, the wrinkle score in each area was significantly higher in Caucasian females than in Japanese females. The wrinkle scores in the forehead, glabella, upper eyelid, and corner of the eye were similar at advanced ages between the two groups, while the wrinkle scores in lower areas of the face (lower eyelid, nasolabial groove, cheek, and corner of the mouth) were markedly higher in Caucasian females than in Japanese females in each age group, and reached an upper limit at advanced ages in Caucasian females. The sagging score also increased with age in Caucasian females as well as in Japanese females. The sagging score was significantly higher in Caucasian females than in Japanese females in the groups aged 40 years or more. These results suggest more marked wrinkle formation in all areas of the face in younger age groups of Caucasian females living in North America than in Japanese females living in Tokyo. In particular, Caucasian females showed marked age-related wrinkle formation in the lower areas of the face, probably due to sagging in the subzygomatic area, which suggests a higher susceptibility to sagging in the subzygomatic area of Caucasian females.

Revue / Journal Title
Journal of cosmetic science   ISSN 1525-7886   CODEN JCSCFC 

Source / Source
2004, vol. 55, no4, pp. 373-385 [13 page(s) (article)] (17 ref.)

Langue / Language
Anglais

Editeur / Publisher
Society of Cosmetic Chemists, New York, NY, ETATS-UNIS  (1998) (Revue)

A recent visit to my dermatologist explained this "phenomena" to me. Caucasian (or white) skin tends to wrinkle as it ages. This is partly due to the lower levels of melanin in fairer skin. On the other hand, Asian skin gets darker spots and pigments. This is why you rarely see wrinkle cream on sale here but an abundance of skin lightening creams and age spot reducers. Different types of skin age differently. Had the 'researchers' above looked at men (imagine the horror - comparing men's looks!) they would have noticed that it's not just the women who wrinkle more.  

The aunties I see at the wet market sure have not aged any better than many Caucasian women.