Another cultural weekend

[A view]

If you think this is racism, you're an idiot. I'm not preaching hatred, or inciting supremacy. I'm stating an opinion - to which I am entitled - that social courtesy is lacking here based on the cultural values that I know exist elsewhere around the world. And I'm not saying because they lack here, the nationality is in any way inferior, I'm stating that society would be more pleasant if a more polite culture were cultivated.

The Singapore government runs courtesy campaigns. Are they racist for the inference those commercials make? Of course not.

Lowest common denominators? You mean stereotyping? That's human nature and based on generalization which comes from evidence of the majority. Locals earn the reputation of being impolite for a reason, I guess. The same way British have the reputation of being 'reserved' etc: etc:. From that denominator perhaps a society should seek ways to improve.

Of course, progress will stall when you can't voice a criticism. People like you are the problem in the world - jumping on the moral high ground while completely missing the point being made, and thus paralyzing the chance at improving the status quo.

[be careful]

If you think this is racism, you're an idiot. I'm not preaching hatred, or inciting supremacy. I'm stating an opinion - to which I am entitled - that social courtesy is lacking here based on the cultural values that I know exist elsewhere around the world. And I'm not saying because they lack here, the nationality is in any way inferior, I'm stating that society would be more pleasant if a more polite culture were cultivated.

I've always thought that I was quite good with trying not to go on about people here in front of my kids but they picked it up anyway.  We've been here quite a long time now and occasionally in the past I'd mentioned some incident where there were a bunch of rowdy kids on the bus or someone shoved in front of me and I hadn't mentioned what nationality I thought those people were but our youngest used to often say 'were they Chinese' or 'were they Singaporean'. 

So you need to be very careful with how you are around people when living abroad (or even going on holiday) because kids pick up more than you realise and while you don't think you're being racist, your kids might come across that way in the future because they've picked it up from your actions or the fact that you only ever seem to huff and puff about people from here.

I bet you said or indicated something this weekend which your children will have picked up on, so you think you're just stating an opinion, but to them, those people who look Asian have done something bad and they'll remember that.

[A view]

What you are advising is to be tactful, rather than careful. Sure, my kids know not to refer to race or color when they see an inappropriate behavior. They simply quote the behavior, as that is the problem we are talking about. But at the same time, my kids are also aware of the fact that rudeness in Singapore is more common than other countries they spend time in. Thus they won't be taken advantage of when here, ie, having someone push in front of them in a queue.   

[The reality]

I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm getting the impression that the OP hasn't been around much if this kind of behavior is so offensive. Off-hand I can think of a dozen countries where she'd never survive.

[modena]

sorry OP, but you ARE coming across badly and racist.  Many racists don't see themselves as that way but often others do see them exactly for what they are.  I've moaned about certain occasions that I found rude here and very annoying, but I also see many positives and have had lots of help and consideration shown as well.  You have labelled a whole culture negatively and encouraged your children to think that way too, definitely sounds racist or at the least very arrogant and boorish.

[agree with PP]

I can respect different cultures and values and rituals, having lived in lots of countries. But on saying that, here it is a very ugly culture for a city. Absolutely no social grace, consideration or respect. No common courtesy. Utterly selfish. Well, I've explained the way things are here to my young children. They now know to use whatever is free; don't waste time waiting for a turn on anything; and not to give a sh*t about others waiting for a turn if they are using something!
When in Rome...     

Yup... have to agree with Modena and others - OP sounds racist to me as well; hate to see what her children will turn out to be when they grow up with that kind of teaching. 

[A view]

Think what you like. Your kids will be the ones badly affected, not mine. Your kids will be the ones 'losing out' (to quote the local kiasu mindset) as they get jumped in queues, as all the food gets taken from the buffet, as they lose turns at the arcades. My kids are adopting the same local culture - ugly as it is - but they understand it's not appropriate outside this red dot, where customs prefer more polite interaction.

[SAE]

Think what you like. Your kids will be the ones badly affected, not mine. Your kids will be the ones 'losing out' (to quote the local kiasu mindset) as they get jumped in queues, as all the food gets taken from the buffet, as they lose turns at the arcades. My kids are adopting the same local culture - ugly as it is - but they understand it's not appropriate outside this red dot, where customs prefer more polite interaction.

Perhaps, but my kids will be the ones with friends in life and yours will get eaten alive when they leave this "red dot" and try their behaviour out in the real world.  But hey, if that makes me an idiot I can deal with it, at least I will be an idiot with well brought up children who know how to behave with people from all walks of life.  What are you going to tell them in a couple of years when they see an Asian face outside of Singapore???  I can assure you that as their mum you will be the one left with the red face - probably from someone smacking it .

[A view]

Don't think so, my kids are very popular, with kids from various nationalities and cultures. They all have one thing in common too: good manners. No-one will be slapping my face, believe me; think size and power.

And I love the way all you holier-than-... preach your perfection. What bullsh*t. You're just the same. You think the same thoughts. It's just you don't have the cajones to tell it as it is. Political correction is what is wrong with the world today. But you've probably got a view on that as well...

[SAE]

And I love the way all you holier-than-... preach your perfection. What bullsh*t. You're just the same. You think the same thoughts. It's just you don't have the cajones to tell it as it is. Political correction is what is wrong with the world today. But you've probably got a view on that as well...

Yes I do as a matter of fact but I'm betting its different from yours!   

[There you go.....]

Don't think so, my kids are very popular, with kids from various nationalities and cultures. They all have one thing in common too: good manners. No-one will be slapping my face, believe me; think size and power.

And I love the way all you holier-than-... preach your perfection. What bullsh*t. You're just the same. You think the same thoughts. It's just you don't have the cajones to tell it as it is. Political correction is what is wrong with the world today. But you've probably got a view on that as well...

That is what defines a racist; what they think.  YOU think that we (as Europeans) are superior and you have convinced yourself that everyone thinks like you.  Lightbulb moment; some of us really don't.  Cajones or not, much as everyone has their frustrations, they do not automatically put it down to race and therefore conclude (and worse still teach their children) that other nationalities and races are inferior because of some differences and a few bad experiences.  

[impressed...]

You think I'm going to teach my kids to be polite or give way or give turns when locals don't give a sh*t about reciprocating? Hell, they probably have some crazy idea that they have 'gained face' by one-upping the foreigner by embracing such behavior.  

They now know to use whatever is free; don't waste time waiting for a turn on anything; and not to give a sh*t about others waiting for a turn if they are using something!

What bullsh*t. You're just the same. You think the same thoughts. It's just you don't have the cajones to tell it as it is.

Wow... I'm also really impressed with OP's use of language.... 

[There you go.....]

To be fair to the OP, I think 'A View' is a different and much more bigoted poster.

[United Nations]

I am an expat here in Singapore although I am neither a Caucasian, nor an East Asian (or Malay/Indian).

I fully agree that there is a general lack of social graces here.  It seems that if something is not of immediate advantage to them, they immediately lose interest.

However, as a non-European, I also would like to share the observation that some (many?) Europeans/Caucasians have an exaggerated sense of entitlement here and act in a haughty, offhand way towards others.  
It seems that the junior executive transferred from some satellite office in Milton Keynes UK or Hicksville USA feels suddenly imbued with taste, civility and sophistication hitherto unsuspected back home and proceeds to lecture the locals and make demands aggressively.    

As a neutral bystander, I find that arrogance quite distasteful too.  Admittedly, I noticed the same sh!t in Dubai too and perhaps it was worse there as, instead of the apocryphal junior executive, you tended to have the tattooed lowlife rabble running amok.

[There you go.....]

Fair point PP.  It's not just the junior employees either.  Have you met their wives or seen the way that they treat their helpers?  I've only ever lived as en expat in one other city and it is SO MUCH WORSE here for some reason.