I see whack the Brits time!
Yep good old Gaius Julius Caesar - the man for whom the phrase "Watch your back" was invented, pity he didn't listen. Caesar landed at Deal on August 27th 55 BC, and after a few disasters returned to Gaul after just a few weeks. July 7th 54 BC is the date of the second expedition when the Romans had some degree of success. Caesar withdrew from England in September 54 BC as he was having problems with the Gauls (Think Astrix and Obelix) and could not cope with the true blue (woad)warriors in England.
Emperor Claudius was the man who arranged the true Roman invasion but this was not until 43 AD, so you have a few more years to wait to celebrate Maxthecat! Of course the Brits eventually threw the Romans out; however they did us a great service in uniting the warring tribes. Now all that is left of the Romans is some fine architecture, the origins of some of our roads, Hadrian's wall, and the odd Pizza place.
Of course back then when people considered the British Isles important enough to invade, North America was still in the hands of it's rightful owners the American Indians. Leif Ericson, the Viking seaman, who discovered North America was sensible enough to stay in Newfoundland and not come further south (He has a mobile phone company now). Columbus, Cabot, Vespucci, De Léon, Cortez, Verrazono, De Soto, Raleigh all followed.
What is now the USA was first invaded by the Spanish in 1565, We Brits set up camp in 1584 and following our defeat of the Spanish Armada in 1588 the Spanish eventually left. Of course it was the worst elements and trouble makes from Europe who moved to the USA, in later years we transported them to Australia!
By 1775 we Brits realised the immigrants were now calling themselves "Americans" having been disowned by their own countries, and were revolting. By 1776 we realised it was time to convince you to go it alone. Someone slipped Washington a copy of the Magna Carta (written in 1215 guaranteeing liberties to the English people, proclaiming basic rights and procedures, and which later become the foundation stone of modern democracy) from which he plagarised the Declaration of Independence. Shortly afterwards we left for home and left you to massacre the bison and buffalo instead of us.
Now look what you have done - invaded by illegal immigrants (No Brits of course) from all over the world, and the Spanish have got their own back as Spanish is fast becoming your National language. We Brits were sensible enough never to go to California but you and your buddies Maxthecat choose to live on top of an earthquake site!
Now what were you saying about us Brits ? Rule Brittania! I will now don my kevlar helmet and jacket in readiness to duck incoming!!
